Sexuality has had an enormous global shadow, that is now coming to light, and being transformed by those bringing higher consciousness to sexuality. This does not happen overnight and as many people are waking up to greater truths and healing capacities around sexuality, while also sometimes mixing it with their un-tintegrated shadows along the way. This goes for men and women, but in this post however I am going to speak to a common dynamic I have witnessed specifically with male tantric healers offering healing to women.
We are seeing an uprising of women having the courage to speak up around violating sexual behaviour, this goes for not only the #metoo movement and the mainstream but also for the spiritual community. Sexual distortions exist not only in mainstream culture, but just as much within the ‘conscious community’.
Just in the past year I’ve witnessed 2 prominent women publicly calling out their partners/ex-partners who are also public figures in the field of sexual healing, for their shadow behaviors. The thai tantric healing school is facing accusations of misconduct. I’ve worked with many women to transform the damage done by male tantric healers who have misused their ‘healing’ gifts and confused them with their own attraction, sexual desires, and lack of consent. I’ve helped women heal and untangle from lovers and partners that “opened” them sexually and then had zero self responsibility and zero regard for the effects of such a deep opening.
***Sexual healing power is a great responsibility and must be used with the utmost purity and self responsibility, with clear agreements and boundaries. And with the deepest honor for what it brings to the surface. I’ve learned this from being on both sides.
I’ve also personally witnessed the un-integrated and manipulative shadow aspects of multiple men that are public figures and self-proclaimed proponents of the goddess and sexual healing. Are all male tantric healers misusing their power? Definitely not, I’m sure they are amazing ones out there. I share this with no judgement as we are all on a healing path, sharing and learning as we go.
As many women are being called to awaken these deeply powerful and pleasurable part of themselves, I would like to share some insights for women who are called to heal their sexuality at this time.
Here are some things to consider when it comes to sexual healing:
1. Women who are healing sexually, many times are still learning their bodies and boundaries. Rather than someone imposing their “healing” or “guidance” on what your body needs, they should be asking permission step by step. This gets you back into your body so that YOU can learn its language and decide what feels right.
2. When someone holds powerful tantric healing gifts- it can not only activate love, healing, opening, and pleasure within others, but it can also activate their deepest pain.
Healing comes in layers- sure someone may help to heal a wound, but that may just open another wound, and is that person going to be there to hold you through the next layer? If it’s a relationship, are their clear agreements and healthy communication in your relationship? Or if its a practitioner are their clear boundaries between client and practitioner?
3. In my opinion sexual healing can happen during sexual encounters- but for the most part this is only loving relationships with clear agreements. Aside from that, I see that many times it can cause far more trauma. Sexual healing can happen energetically or through touch with ZERO penetration or even sexual energy being aroused. Please take this into consideration of you are embarking on a sexual healing journey with someone that you don’t know very well. Is it actually in your highest good to open a sexually with them? Is there a deep trust present? What are the repercussions of them opening places that have never been touched or opened before, and will they be around to support you in the aftermath?
4. There is a great power in women healing their sexuality with other women – in clear and sacred containers. In ancient times priestesses would work with one another sexually. There was an understanding of the feminine energy, the female body, and of the sexual connection with the divine. We would teach one another, activate one another, and heal one another, and these practices are being revived today. When a woman feels safe, and the energy of divine mother is present, where she knows that absolutely *nothing* wants to be taken from her, only given, then true healing can happen.
Just because someone is psychic or have sexual healing gifts does not necessarily mean that they are pure in their intentions, entitled to your body, or will honor what gets brought up after.
Be protective of your sexual flame and use great discernment around who you let in your sacred space. Much healing can be done without even the touch of a finger.
In ancient times, when women´s spiritual practices were widely accepted, the womb was considered a sacred spiritual centre, a source of love, intuition, wisdom, pleasure, and vitality. It was revered and worshiped as the source of life. All women can still tap into the gifts of their womb, whether or not they have had children, whether they are fertile or post menopausal, and even if they have had their wombs partially or wholly removed.
However many women today, are disconnected from their wombs, know little about them, and hold various pain and trauma that can create physical dis-ease, unhealthy relationship patterns, creative blocks, or other blocks that prevent them from experiencing what they want in life. We are socialized to live life from the mind rather than our body wisdom. Our menstrual cycles are seen as burdens, and our wombs are seen as disposable, with hysterectomies and c-sections given out like candy. Wombs are an ignored and endangered organ, as C-sections are the #1 most common surgery in the US, and hysterectomys are #2. Women’s bodies all over the world have been violated and objectified, leaving women with a limited and distorted perspective of their own body and it’s inherent capabilities.
Many women still hold armour around this beautiful and powerful part of themselves. Being disconnected from the womb means we are operating from a portion of our power, creating a portion of what we are capable of, and experiencing partial fulfillment. When we release these blocks, we make room to utilize the rich beauty, guidance, and pleasure our womb has to offer.
Women are astounded when they finally come home to the voice of their womb, and begin to act on its guidance. They find a deeper knowing, a more primal, creative, and wise voice within. They transform out of being uninspired and disconnected, to being turned on about life, feeling more confident, passionate, spiritually connected, and feminine.
Our wombs hold our greatest power as women, and yet can also carry our greatest wounding.
Some things that can be held in the womb, that are useful to release, are:
- Sexual trauma.
- Other people’s energy, especially past lovers, that can distort our intuition.
- Energetic chords creating relationship dependency.
- Emotions such as grief, shame, guilt, fear, and anger.
- Protective armour that blocks love, connection and pleasure.
- Mothers and grandmothers unhealthy patterns and limiting beliefs.
Womb healing and awakening is the new feminine revolution. This tiny organ (About 3-4 inches by 2.5 inches), like the heart, it is not just an organ. It holds great wisdom, spiritual and creative power, and is a bridge between the worlds: from spirit to matter. Our womb is are our power-center as women, and is the seat of our intuition. Every human is here because of the a womb and it’s ability to create life.
Womb healing and awakening is a way to access our deeper pleasure as a woman, as the orgasmic pulse flows through the womb. It is a way to activate our creative power, as wombs don’t only create babies, but also our gestate our creative ideas, projects and businesses. Our wombs are extensions of the Mother energy, especially that of Mother Earth, they bleed with the cycles of the Earth and moon, and the wisdom of our wombs is that of the Earth. If all women were tapping into the wisdom of their wombs, the world would look like a very different place, as we would all be serving the greater planetary pulse.
Painting by Emma Plunkett
Womb Healing Can Help
- Painful cramps, fibroids, cysts, cancer
- Healing from birth trauma, misarriage, or abortion
- Unhealthy relationship patterns
- Feeling disconnected or depressed
- Creative blocks or blocked purpose or manifestations
- That feeling that “something’s missing”
- Numbing out or dissociating during sex
- Feeling disconnected from feminine, operating from imbalanced much masculine energy-
- Disconnected from deeper feelings or intuition
- Creative blocks
- Stress, overworking
- Inability to relax or orgasm during sex
- Release life long ancestral patterns
- Deep feminine and soul wound
- Unhealthy boundaries
- Lack of clarity or direction
It takes courage to face the shadow and yet this is where our greatest potential lies, by transforming these parts into wholeness.
What You Can Gain From Womb Healing
- Increased confidence
- Fertility, a clear womb space for healthy conception
- More enjoyable cycle
- Increase intuition clarity wisdom
- Feel more empowered
- Passion in life, work, and relationships
- More connected and clear about your purpose
- Increased sensuality, more available for pleasure and joy
- Reclaimed sexuality
- Increased creativity
- Deeper connection to own feminine, feminine Source, and other women
- Deeper connection with spirituality
- Heart opening, more available for love
- Ease in setting healthy boundaries
- Ability to receive more
- More easily manifest your desires
- Deeper connection and communication with the earth and divine mother
- No longer pass on unhealthy lineage patterns to your children
- Assist in collective healing of the feminine
How Do I Heal My Womb and Access its Magic?
There are many ways to access the magic of the womb. Seeing a womb-guide or womb-healer helps to release any blocks, in addition to adopting a personal practice that will deepen your connection and allow you to access more of your feminine power and pleasure.
Women, take good care of your wombs. It matters.
By Naia Leigh
Are You Ready to Unlock the Power of Your Womb?
Naia’s Womb Healing Sessions include a full womb clearing, and a training on a daily practice you can use for life.
To learn more, CLICK HERE: YOUR WOMB HEALING SESSION.
Naia thrives on life’s beauty, creativity and supporting others in their passions and purpose. She is an international women’s empowerment coach, writer and artist, and guides both the individual and collective process of women’s empowerment. She is the founder of Boundless®, a modality that clears the root causes of blockages, and she leads international retreats and Boundless trainings. Her mission is to create sacred space for women to reunite, heal, and empower one another to be all that they are, and support a new feminine leadership in the world.
Learn more about Naia and her offerings at NaiaLeigh.com.
“The wound is the place the light enters you” ~Rumi
The Core Wound
We all have one. A doozy. It varies from person to person, depending on individual circumstance and experience, and can be passed down from generation to generation. It shapes us, how we view ourselves, how we connect with others. It dictates how we feel in the world, and what we create in our lives. It can limit us drastically, and at the same time, can give us our greatest wisdom, passion, and gifts.
Our core wound is our shadow. Our deepest pain. It’s the limiting program that we operate from, stemmed from a traumatic experience or expeiences in our lives. It challenges our sense of worth and safety. It may be the thing we are most ashamed about, or the thing wanted to avoid dealing with at all costs.
Or, we may have done years of work on it, and yet it still shows up in our reality time and again. Life can be going amazing… and then inevitably… “it” shows up, rearing its familiar head.
It’s impact echoes throughout our lives, repeating the same wound until we fully transform it. It’s that limiting belief or pattern that’s been haunting you, perhaps since childhood. Things may look shiny on the outside- great job, nice house, good friends and partner… but in the inside, when something triggers it, you revert to feeling like you did at the inception of that wound.
When we are young, we are free, trusting, creative, and unconditionally loving. Inevitably, in a mad world, something happens to hurt us and shut this freedom down. We feel that maybe we may not as loved or as safe as we thought, and we may actually be better off not being happy, shining our light, sharing our love, or believing in our dreams. It may have been a traumatic betrayal, abandonment, abuse, neglect, rejection, or failure. It may have been a challenging home life, parent(s) that didn’t know how to give you what you needed, that left, or didn’t protect you. It may have been ongoing, or acute trauma.
You may create wonderful things in your life, but somehow always relive certain emotions such as feeling anxious, unworthy, unlovable, ashamed, or flawed. You may self doubt, self-criticize, self sabotage, or feel like a victim. You may feel unsafe or untrusting, or unlovable, or even stupid. You may numb-out, disconnect, or or feel like a failure. You may strive for perfection, acceptance, or validation. You may repeat the same unhealthy patterns in relationships or have intense triggers such as grief or anger. You may be an avoidant, or anxious attachment style.
Whatever it is, you know its not who you are, and you long to be free of it so you can go on with your life.
If this sounds familiar, you are not alone.
The great news is, as humanity is evolving in consciousness, so are our methods of healing. We are seeing more and more modalities that can create powerful change in a more direct, effective and immediate ways. We no longer have to go to years and years of therapy, dishing out thousands of dollars processing and reliving our childhoods. We do not have to spend the rest of our lives believing we are not capable, worthy, or good enough to have what we deeply desire, or sabotaging it due to a old and false narrative.
Our greatest wound becomes our greatest power when we are willing to face it.
Methods in the field of transpersonal and energy-psychology, such as Boundless are able to access the subconscious and energetic core root of these traumas, blocks, and limiting beliefs, and are able to transform them with far greater ease and efficiency, saving lots of time, future pain, and money.
These methods support us to embody more of who we are, and to finally reclaim creative control over our lives. When we stop giving our energy to these limiting beliefs, and instead direct it toward that which we chose to create… magic can happen. We can reap the beauty and the lessons from what we experienced. We can heal, forgive, and empower ourselves to write a new story…
that will inevitably touch the lives of many others.
Men and women both carry shame. Men have carried repressed shame for their manhood because of what man has done to the feminine including the earth. Collectively they have not carried out their role as the protectors of the feminine safety, wisdom and spirit, but as I mentioned before, this is not due to an instinctual flaw in the male species, it is due to the manipulation of the human race. Manhood and masculinity is a gift, and meant to serve and protect the feminine, but they are not able to do this when shame is present, for they will become either guarded and defensive due to this subconscious guilt and insecurity, or the opposite – overly passive and sensitive due to rejecting their masculinity.
As men carry suppressed shame around being a man, women carry shame simply for being women due to the conditioning that they are less worthy and that our divine sexuality is a sin. Women carry collective shame for their bodies, beauty (or not being ‘beautiful enough’- either way it’s a double edged sword), emotions and ability to access the multidimensional realms. We have carried shame specifically around the menstrual cycle and for the messiness of sex and birth, when in fact all of these things, are directly related to our feminine power, wisdom, and gifts as women. When we alchemize shame into reverence for these inherent gifts, we are then able to access the full power of them… which we all desperately need at this time.
Shame is a suppressive force that serves no positive purpose. It also is not ours, and is simply an internalizing of collective conditioning or inter-relational shaming. (Whenever I clear shame with people, we first have to get rid of other people’s energy and beliefs, many times this clears it all together). Overall there is much shame associated with our genders. Shame for our light. Shame for being big. Smart. Sexual. Feminine or masculine. And for being different than the mainstream. These are the qualities that, in reality, will set us free.
Whether or not we -consciously- subscribe to religious dogma or mainstream fear-based conditioning, we are still collectively purging the effects of thousands of years of shaming. It’s passed down from our ancestors and cellular memories of past lives, in addition to modern familial, religious and social conditioning.
More on mshame…ease shame and access our innate super powers as men and women? The first step is to look at it. Shame is a deep rejection of self that hides in the deepest closets of our consciousness. We must bring it out into the light to dissolve it, and to do the work on the subconscious levels to be aligned with embodying our truth and power. We must ‘re-parent’ ourselves and reassure our ‘younger selves’ that they are worthy and have nothing to be ashamed of… even if they were made to fee that way. We must gather with those doing the work to liberate it, and to together, collectively rewrite our social standards.
For women, do you apologize a lot? Do you dumb down your voice? Do you hide your beauty or suppress your sensuality? Do you not choose your pleasure or ask for what you want? Do you ignore or hide your intuition, psychic gifts or emotions? Do you try to hide your menstruation? Are you ashamed of your body, body functions, or body parts?
Sadly these have become the norm, and this is -not- normal. It contributes to a suppressed humanity incapable of freeing ourselves from the shackles of the patriarchy. It is time to gather with our communities and mentors and embrace those around us that have liberated these parts of ourselves. We do need one another, as we are innately driven by social acceptance (subconscious survival mechanism as well as an innate need to bond) and will only feel safe to embody these gifts when we feel we are surrounded by safe and resonant relationships and group containers. We are amazing beautiful beings with so, much much to share with the world, and the world needs us to come out of the closet and unabashedly be our bright, bold, beautiful and pleasure-filled selves.
If you feel called to begin this journey one on one, Boundless Modality clears these subconscious imprints. Learn more at BoundlessModality.com.
There is a lot going on in the world! Feeling angry? Me too.
I’m a feeler. feel a lot. I feel a lot about my life, and the world. I have had to ask myself time and again… What do I do with this anger?
Am I supposed to keep smiling? Cook dinner? Continue business as usual? But the anger feels so big! And at times I don’t feel it at all, but I know it’s there, just waiting to be expressed in a healthy way.
Today, I write about positively channeling anger, in hopes that other women will rage and write with me.
The womb is the portal in which we transform spirit into form. This is no light matter, it is the feminine power of Creation, that lies within us. Whether we be bring the soul of a child into human form, we take a creative project from the ethers and ground it into reality, we channel healing for ourselves or others, or simply express ourselves through music, or art – it is all the same primal life-force energy that we tap into.
Even though pleasure takes many forms, we are mainly used to hearing the word pleasure in a sexual context, only spoken about in hushed voices accompanied by naughty guilt and school-girl giggles.
The truth is, pleasure is a part of who you are. It is in our innate nature to experience pleasure in its many forms, and when we are living in alignment with our soul, we experience a-llllot of pleasure.